Sometimes autism isn’t cute. Sometimes it sucks.
It’s not fun to have a constant urge to scream, punch my head or slam my head into things.
It’s not fun to have to thrash my body around to get an unpleasant sensation from somewhere inside myself to stop.
It’s not fun to feel like electric current is running through my skin when I sit too still.
It’s not fun to have my entire brain overwhelmed by a noise nobody else notices.
It’s not fun to not be able to start “simple” tasks because all the little steps to take in order to start feel like a mountain to climb.
It’s not fun not being able to tell somebody something because I can’t get my brain to lock words and their meanings together to form a coherent sentence in writing or via speech.
It’s not fun having people accuse me of yelling because I talk louder than normal so I’m heard, and then having everybody get annoyed and tell me to repeat myself if I talk quieter.
It’s not fun being unable to understand the person talking to you from a foot away because the room you’re in is full of chattering people.
It’s not fun not being able to manage a simple task like write a phone number down because the room is too hot, too cold, loud, chaotic and bright, and it feels like trying to write while skydiving through an F5 tornado and landing in a tsunami, and everybody is pissed off at me because “writing a phone number is so simple!”
Sometimes autism sucks.
Sometimes isn’t always.
But sometimes.
Sometimes.
It sucks.
When I very first started finding the autistic community online I felt a little isolated, because there was so much autism positivity and at that time in my life I did NOT like my autism at all. The positivity has been wonderful and helped me accept myself a lot more – but I think it’s also important that we sometimes talk about how HARD autism can be, because it IS hard. I want both positivity and encouragement, but also the ability to talk to other people and say “hey I had a meltdown today and it was awful”or “today I’ve been struggling with sensory overload and I’m not feeling awesome about my neuro-divergence”and have that understanding and compassion from others and see their struggles also so it feels less lonely.
Basically, i think a positive focus is great, but focusing on the positive exclusively doesn’t provide belonging and support for those going through bad times, and quite frankly is not realistic.
So really… thanks for acknowledging that it sucks sometimes. I feel that.
Tag: yeah
you ever see/hear a dude you liked/admired say or do somethin gross and suddenly the veneer washes away and you finally see him as he is and ur like “wow he really was a man the whole time”
skateboarding is very sexy BUT only if youre a gay girl
my soul is a rose garden
the harry potter books rated by Harry’s Sass™
the sorcerer’s stone: dudley asking harry if he wants to practice sticking his head down the toilet and harry replying “no thanks, the poor toilet’s never had anything as horrible as your head down it – it might be sick” like ooo!!! sick burn!!! good for an 11 year old but overall still in the developmental stage. 6/10
the chamber of secrets: dudley (once again lmao get rekt) telling harry “i know what day it is” and harry replying “well done, so you’ve finally learned the days of the week.” lockhart trying to be all Amazing Teacher™ and shit and telling harry “just do what i did, harry!” and harry saying “what, drop my wand?” overall good but not with as much of an Oomph™ factor as the sorcerer’s stone. 5/10
the prisoner of azkaban: ah yes!!! Harry’s Sass™ in its adolescent years!!!! no longer a toddler, now solidly about 11 years old. draco making fun of harry for fainting at the quidditch game bc of the dementors and saying “shame [the broom] doesn’t come with a parachute – in case you get too near a dementor.” and harry replying “pity you can’t attach an extra arm to yours, malfoy. then it could catch the snitch for you.” 8/10 purely because he fucking MURDERED whiny bitch ass baby malfoy ha ha take that
the goblet of fire: a good amount of sass!! a healthy amount of sass! perhaps a bit held back though (come on harry get it together). rita skeeter annoying harry and asking for a word and jk rowling LITERALLY writing “‘yeah, you can have a word,’ said harry savagely. ‘good-bye'” like FUCK he is canon savage in this book!!!! DAMN!!!!! and then he reks malfoy AGAIN “you know that expression [your mother’s got], like she’s got dung under her nose? has she always looked like that, or was it just because you were with her?” MOTHERFUCK GO OFF 9/10
the order of the phoenix: HOLY GRAIL OF HARRY’S SASS™. THE MOTHERLOAD. GOD DAMN. when vernon asks him why he’s listening to the news again and harry replies w/ “well, it changes every day, you see.” when hermione’s warning him about picking fights w/ malfoy bc malfoy will make life hard for him and harry’s like “wow, i wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life” like fuck harry!!! tell us how u really feel!!!! literally ANY TIME he talks to an adult he doesn’t like. sassing dudley left & right, putting him in his place w/ “this is night, diddykins. that’s what we call it when it goes all dark like this” like fuck harry brought out the big guns w/ “diddykins”. overall wonderful, truly. a good healthy teenage dose of sass. 100/10
the half blood prince: SHIT DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY ANYTHING EXCEPT “THERE’S NO NEED TO CALL ME SIR, PROFESSOR” LIKE FUCK. BEST PART OF THE WHOLE BOOK. OF THE WHOLE SERIES. FUCKING OWNED SNAPE HE’S FUCKIN REKT LYING ON THE FLOOR CRYING DRINKING SOME CHEAP ASS DISGUSTING ASS FIREWHISKEY. BREAKS THE GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKING SCALE SO FAR OFF THE SCALE IT’S ON MARS. INFINITY/10. FUCK.
the deathly hallows: “it’s time you learned some respect!” “it’s time you earned it” sassing the minister of magic hooooooo boy. not much else bc harry’s too busy like saving the world and shit. so extra points for multitasking and being an overall well rounded sass-er. 8/10
i like that stimming is viewed positively online but like if you love me with glitter jars and light patterns, you have to love me with rocking, flapping, hair twirling, and chewing. you dont get to pick and choose what kind of stimming you embrace when you get to know a person. you cant just accept my pretty stim things and reject the others. it doesnt work like that. dont forget it.
Benedict Cumberbatch has publicly stated that he thinks people viewing protagonists in media like Sherlock Holmes as autistic is ‘dangerous’ & ‘lazy’ because it ‘offers false hope’ that autistic people could be ‘brilliant’ or heroic…
so yeah i’m gonna give a pass on his superhero movie, because he doesn’t think people like me deserve heroes, or that we could ever be them.
sorry this is ugly im on mobile but here u go
your post is fine it’s benedict cumberbatch whose comments are ugly
oh my god….in the article linked he literally said that alan turing wasn’t on the spectrum….. and then
“I’m very wary of that, because I’ve met people with those conditions. It’s a real struggle all the time. Then these people pop up in my work and they’re sort of brilliant, and they on some levels almost offer false hope for the people who are going through the reality of it.”
FUCK benedict cumberbatch
lavenduers 