Constantly torn between “if I show symptoms I’m real and valid” and “I can’t show any symptoms because then I’ll be a bother so I have to internalize everything.”
Dont forget “if I can control my symptoms are they still valid”
And “if I show symptoms I’m manipulating the people around me”
Also “if I don’t show symptoms at any given moment I’m lying about having a mental illness and everything is an overreaction”